miscellany

i'm still feeling a bit anxious -- i think i'll be calmer once i've actually started the job -- but this has been my first ativan-free day in at least a month. a couple of times i started to feel that familiar rush of panic, and i just took a deep breath and told myself "relax, you've got a job now," and it settled back down, albeit not quickly and not without many distracting games of backgammon against the computer. (i'd never played backgammon before last week, and i can already consistently beat the computer on the "expert" setting, so i'm guessing it hasn't got very good AI. ask anyone who knows me how lousy i am at playing games.)

( i've done a fair bit of cooking in the last few days. )

this afternoon i ran out to pick up some stuff and met a fabulously gorgeous white husky who was cuddly and charismatic and wrapped his arms around me to kiss me. if i could find a partner that affectionate, i'd be all set.

naturally, since i want to grill, the rain has returned.